Healing Through Long COVID: My Journey

"We don’t know what the long-term consequences are." "What will this do to me?"

These thoughts consumed me when my husband and I fell ill with COVID-19 in March 2021, before vaccines were available. While his symptoms improved, mine lingered. I spent months in bed, struggling with exhaustion and pain. I could barely bathe, lift my arms, or manage basic tasks on my own. 

Despite my desire to work, it was impossible. Simple tasks that once took minutes now required hours. Even reading or holding a conversation for five minutes was overwhelming.

I wasn’t just physically drained; my mind was foggy. Words escaped me, memories vanished, and my once sharp intellect dulled. For someone who prided herself on her memory and language skills, this was terrifying. Who was I without these core parts of myself? Could I ever return to the life I had before? The uncertainty was suffocating.

My doctor put me on medical leave from my lawyer job, and I went on long term disability. I saw over 30 health practitioners in a desperate search for answers. I underwent many tests and tried various prescriptions. Yet no one knew how to actually help me. They all suggested more rest; the one thing I didn't know how to do. 

Eventually, I found hope with someone who had training on Long COVID. A vestibular physiotherapist treated my symptoms as if I had suffered a severe concussion (despite no head injury), and I began a regimen of short rehabilitation exercises. Slowly, I started to improve. My dizziness eased, I could go for short, assisted walks, and I began reading books again. 

I still wasn't able to do the things that made me feel like myself, and I became depressed. Feeling isolated and hopeless, I joined an online health recovery group for individuals with chronic fatigue, and met others from all over the world who were going through something similar. We learned how to pace our energy envelope (using the baseline method) and slowly improve our capacity. 

But physical treatments weren’t enough. I realized that to truly heal, I needed to focus on my mind and nervous system as well. I dove into studying the autonomic nervous system and understanding how it was connected to chronic fatigue and pain. An important part of my learning experience was to synthesize all the information I was reading, as every book used different terms to describe the same things! 

From this deep dive, became clear that feeling safe in my body was going to be key to healing. This was especially challenging for me, as a neurodivergent woman, to feel safe in my body and around others. The experience of chronic illness had left me with medical trauma, and I was used to over-performing to get through life. 

I tried different treatments like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), and Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) with my psychotherapist to address the trauma of illness.

Expressive writing, a practice I had initially resisted, became a powerful tool in my recovery. I used a method called JournalSpeak, writing about stressors for 20 minutes, followed by meditation. This uncomfortable but transformative process helped me process repressed emotions and clear mental fog. Over time, my vocabulary, memories, and intellectual capacity started to return.

Using the teachings from Polyvagal Theory, I started to incorporate vagus nerve stimulation exercises that help shift the body into a rest and digest healing state more often.

Internal Family Systems (IFS) became a clear way for me to communicate with my Protector Parts who wanted me to stay safe in bed and not push myself appropriately, and I increased my capacity in a gentle way. 

One day, after a particularly hopeful therapy session, I remember looking at my reflection in the mirror. My eyes, once dull and lifeless, had regained their sparkle. It was a small but significant moment that confirmed my internal work was healing my body too.

Through dedicated inner work, I regained much of my stamina and mental clarity. I’ve learned that healing from chronic illness requires a blend of physical, mental, and emotional treatments.

My experience with Long COVID taught me that it's not "all in your head" (aka made up), but actually that the mind is a crucial part of recovery. While all pain is real, the source of chronic pain can often be influenced by our mental states and how safe we feel. I learned to support my nervous system, regulate my stress response, and challenge perfectionist thinking that kept me pushing through fatigue in an unsustainable cycle. I put all of my knowledge and experience into this healing map.

I also had to unlearn harmful societal messages—especially as a neurodivergent woman and lawyer in a capitalist, patriarchal society—that I had to be productive to be valued. These pressures likely contributed to my chronic symptoms. I now understand the vital importance of self-compassion, authentic rest, and prioritizing my well-being.

The neurodivergent experience of illness is different, and we have unique safety needs that most programs and books do not address. If you're struggling with chronic illness, know that healing is possible. It may take time but with the right support recovery can be within reach. 

Every journey is unique, and while I was privileged to access the care and resources I needed, I hope that sharing my experience can inspire others to seek the supports that are right for them and their needs. 

Though my chronic illness was the lowest part of my life, writing about it and sharing resources that helped me has led me to meet some of the most caring and driven people! You may want to read my article on CBC National or hear me on Saskatoon CBC morning radio sharing my story of recovery  

My next post will list the books, podcasts, and programs that helped me on my healing journey.

Set up a call with me to see if we are a good fit for health recovery planning! 

I created a collection of digital resources that supported my healing journey - and you can access them here. 

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This does not constitute medical advice, and any new approaches or treatments should be discussed with a knowledgable health care practitioner. 

@theparasympatheticpig